Positive change happens when we change our thoughts, and change our actions. How can we do that?
Awareness, acknowledgement, acceptance, mindfulness, permission, choice and practice. These are some words I would like to focus on today.
Awareness - is to be in-tuned with how you are feeling right now, what you are thinking of at this very moment.
Acknowledgement - is to allow your self to sit with these feelings and thoughts. "What's going on for me now; what has happened to bring me to this state". Perhaps you're feeling confused, lonely, angry, hurt, or perhaps you know you had better days. Acknowledge that you are having these difficult / challenging feelings now.
Acceptance - Embrace those feelings and thoughts; don't suppress or push them away. They are part of you, accept them. You are made unique, and special. We all react and feel differently to situations and that is ok. This is what makes you who you are, a human person with feelings totally unique / different from each other; specially and wonderfully made! The Creator makes no mistake;)
Permission - Give your self permission to feel - to cry or to just be angry and upset. You can also give yourself permission to heal and to make changes you need for your self, for your well-being. Perhaps you need time out, perhaps you need to draw a healthier boundary to feel safer, perhaps you need to learn to say no when you don't have the capacity, or perhaps you just need to switch off from the world and just sit in your PJs, watch the telly and have junk food. Give yourself permission to have some self care, and self love to heal.
Choice - After all that, you do have a choice. To feel better, to be better. You always have choices, even not making a choice is in itself a choice;)
Practice - I am assuming at this word, you intend to feel better, think better and be better by practicing some self care for your well being:)
1) Each morning you wake up, listen, feel and look; name three of each; then think of at least three things you can be grateful off. The sound of crickets, birds, people chatting, the soft sheets on your bed, the bed you're on, the warm/cool air, the colors on the wall/ceiling etc. "I am grateful for the air I breathe today, for the roof over my head, the new day to start my new beginning" etc.
2) Sit and meditate silently for 5 or more mins each day. There are so many on the internet these days and these are some of what I would use : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZToicYcHIOU
3) Practice kindness with your self and your thoughts. My equivalent of the "f.." word is "should, must, have to..". Each time you catch yourself thinking these thoughts or saying these words, "I'm dying to, oh just kill me, I'm sick and tired", I'm not smart, etc, change them!
"I will do my best, I can do better next time, I am learning and that is ok, I am worthy, this is amazing - I am amazing, I am bold and I can do this, I am going to show up and it doesn't matter what people have to say because I am brave, I choose to learn, I choose to be believe in myself, I am bright, I am brassy, I can do this. This is tough but so am I! No one can take my power away from me unless I allow them to.
In short, catch it (your thoughts), check it (if it is true, perhaps its not "always" - I am always clumsy, I am always slow, I am always left out"), and change it! We may not be able to control the situation, BUT we are in charge of how we feel and respond. Stay bright, stay well, stay strong.